The two simple rules to weight loss

Greetings Biscuit-fans,

At Biscuit-Nikki towers it is well documented that we have a slight weakness towards biscuit based confectionary(slight weakness being an understatement) and as of 2 mins ago there's still not a biscuit based diet plan in circulation (patent is pending).

I think this weakness is largely genetic. My family has a rich and wonderful history with food (biscuits especially) and those of you that know me well, will know that little Biscuit Nikki (aka my sister) is a fantastic cake/pastry chef.  She follows in my Granddad's large footsteps, as he was also a chef and I am sure there's plenty more hiding in the branches of the family tree.

With this in mind my family as a whole, have lots of experience with dieting. My Nan has tried everything going - including acupuncture and hypnotherapy. And I think it is now safe to say that my generation (mainly me and my sister) have nailed it! Let me reveal my secret:

1. Eat a BALANCED diet
2. Exercise more

I'm calling it the common sense diet (patent also still pending).

You can imagine how shocked I was to find that this idea is not original and has been recycled many many times before (see latest government health campaign). You would also think that with all the 'join this site to learn one weird tip for a flatter stomach' websites around that no one knows my 2 amazing rules for a more healthy life.

I'm always blown over by how many people always want a quick fix for everything (see X-factor) instead of the tried and tested reliable route. There is no quick fix, every diet fad (yes I said it - FAD) is essentially based on those two tips - eat less and do more.

And it's with this in mind that I just want to talk about 'The Lemonade Diet'. I could easily substitute it for the Atkins diet, the cabbage soup diet, the chocolate diet and the soon-to-be-famous biscuit diet (book in process). I have chosen the 'Lemonade diet' because it is the sole most stupidest thing I have heard about all week - and that includes the conversation I had with the self-scan check out a few days ago!  (Unexpected item in shopping basket - how can it be unexpected when I scanned the bread moments earlier - I think that constitutes a fair warning).

Some of you may be blissfully ignorant of the lemonade diet - let me just take a sledgehammer to your naivety.




When life gives you lemons - don't go on the lemonade diet


The lemonade diet involves spending up to 10 days eating NOTHING (see point 1 - eat less) and drinking only salt water, laxative tea and "lemonade". Which will largely make you vomit and poo a lot more (for the hell of it see point 2 - do more).

 Oh and it's not what you probably think of as lemonade (various fizzy brands available) but a lemon drink that you add hot pepper to. If you are unsure about how to make your lemonade (see: lazy) then you can pay lots of money to have some delivered to you (but you are kind of cheating on point 2 - do more). There's several recipes available for this lemonade - I wont write them here for fear that someone may actually try to make it. Oh and also if you're worried about being laughed at when saying you're on the 'lemonade diet' you can also call it 'The Master Cleanse' - but you will sound like you've joined a cult.

Do this and you'll loose an arbitrary amount of weight and probably die from not eating anything.

Where to begin on how stupid this is...

Your body needs food. There's several scientific reports and millions of years of experience and anecdotal evidence that prove this one, so it's not up for argument. If you don't eat, your body goes into 'starvation mode' and the next time you do eat your body will convert the food largely to fat, in order to support your body for any potential lack of food that might arise in the future (like if you decide to try some other stupid diet). This is why a large portion of people will immediately put back on any weight they lost (and more in lots of cases) when they come off their FAD diet.

To be honest I can't even be bothered to write any more about this, as this argument alone proves it: You need food - this diet suggests no food = stupid diet. I'll take an extra point for showing my working out.

It's occurred to me that I might have offended some people who are on this diet, but if you really think this is a good idea then you should probably have supervision whilst using the internet.

Thank you - I'm here all week.

Please send any complaints to me and I will provide you with a free copy of my latest Biscuit Diet Plan (normal price £50) as a way to say sorry.
On another train of thought if you're genuinely thinking of doing that then don't. I haven't finished writing the plan in biro on the back on my mouse mat yet (ok I'm lying - I only have a Crayola Crayon and it's red for those of you interested).

The Happy Biscuit Diet Plan

Love and hugs to all my running friends!

- Latest foot news -
X-ray came back as healed and I've been allowed to start running in small doses again. Some of you may have seen a rare sighting of me at the Runneymead Relay last month and it's true, I am back up to small races. Let the training commence!

Keep using common sense!

Biscuit Nikki x

Tickled Pink

The inability to run has clearly not affected my ability to want and purchase new running gear! We may be entering the summer of discontent, but I am keeping calm and carrying on by doing my bit for boosting sale numbers and attempting to purchase more pairs of trainers.
I never used to like shoe shopping and generally found that all my outfit combinations could be completed by my vintage boots. Those of you that know me well will know exactly what pair of boots they are, as I'm generally either found wearing those boots or wearing trainers. I've yet to find an outfit that my boots don't go with, regardless of what a few certain mum's think (they do go with dresses I tell you!).

So this weekend I found myself in Alton Sports buying a new pair of trail trainers - (Adidas Kanadia TR3's WITH gore tex for you running geeks out there!) Oh yes - no wet feet for me come the cross country season! I'm slightly miffed actually, as I have since come home and found them on sale for almost £10 cheaper on their website...grrrrr!!!! Lesson learnt there - don't trust Saturday shop assistants!

Anyway - where was I?
I have slowly been edging towards the stage where I have more bits of running gear and shoes than 'going out' and evening outfits.  I can co-ordinate running outfits for a full week (including head bands) but am stuck for nice outfits after just two evenings out. This has all been put on hold whilst I've been on the bench and it's given me a chance to try and right the balance a bit. Which of course I didn't do and continued to scorer the internet for things to buy when I am 'back' to form.

All this sportaholic shopping puts me in a pretty good position for the next rant - what's with all the pink?

Seriously - there are other colours out there! Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with pink - I just don't understand why 99%* (*numbers not representative of any real statistic) of all women's kit is in pink. Is this a supply and demand thing? Because when I'm out at events I see just as much of every other colour - so where are all these runners buying the pink?
Look at all the professional elite athletes - when they're not wearing GB colours they're not usually in pink either. It just drives me mad. When the winter season comes and we're back to reflective coats again I guarantee the men will have a choice of fluorescent yellow, green or orange whereas in the women's clothes racks it will be yellow or pink.

Karrimor Hi Vis Jacket (Pic from Sweatshop)

Trainers as well - look at the latest 'On running' Cloudtech shoes. You can have black/green or blue/azure if you're a man and the women's shoe comes in...well pink/pink. Good. Well Done market research team.


Nike Running Shorts "Oh what a nice pair of black shorts - how can we make them better? I know - let's add a pink underlayer for the hell of it."

So if any sports companies are reading this then firstly - Adidas good work on the Kanadia's (they're not pink) and to everybody else: I'd really like to be able to buy compression gear in yellow - "Kill Bill" style (I'm looking in your direction 'Skins') and have you ever thought about all the poor men out there that might want to be visible in pink reflective jackets?

Of course - at the end of the day the colour doesn't really matter and it's how hard you race and whether you achieve your own targets, not what you're wearing.

Can you imagine being beaten by someone looking like they've fallen out of Kill Bill  film though? Seriously? Genius.

Keep hiding your credit cards!

Love Biscuit Nikki x

P.S The above gear (apart from the Kill Bill pic) can all be purchased from Sweatshop. I'm not advertising them, that's just where I got the pictures from. Oh and also I am joking about the Kill Bill thing (unless you've found somewhere that sells yellow compression gear then please inbox me)

Please hold caller: I'll be right with you...

Whoa - so I've been a bit AWOL lately. You could say I've been neglecting my blogging duties, or you could say I've just been hugely busy...read on:

Firstly, Mr Biscuit Nikki has passed his PhD! We had a few weeks of him being inseperable from his laptop and books but he had the final test last week (viva for all you fluent in academic lingo) and passed!!! As a treat I then whisked him away to Prague in the Czeck Republic and we spent 4 days trying to not look like ignorant English tourists.

I highly recommend Prague, it's a beautiful city and if you stay off the pub/club streets you can largely avoid the copious amounts of stag groups that are attracted to the fact that in many places, beer is cheaper than lemonade. We even went on a three hour tour of the city on Segways. If you ever get the chance to ride a segway I recommend them. They're really easy to get the hang of, as they are incredibly intuative and our tour guide insisted they are very hard to fall off of. I did prove this wrong slightly later on in the tour but wasn't hurt. Oh and Jon (aka Mr Biscuit Nikki) nearly fell off a cliff (no exageration). Again I suspect this was more down to our lack of skills than the segways, or our guide's ability to teach people (or the cheap price of beer).

We left deciding that we need to learn to speak the basic langage before our next Eurpoean trip. Letting everyone speak English to us just became embarassing when we knew so little about their native tongue. This was even more apparent when, after several attempts to point and gesture at the item or service we wanted, the shop assistant or waiter would simply respond with 'how can I help you madame?' Oh and we're also going to learn the art of packing everything into hand luggage to get one over on Easyjet (if you've travelled with them you'll know what I mean).

So we quite fancy Sweden and are now looking for a good way to learn Swedish. There are several bits of software around so we'll see how we get on!

After all the travelling excitment, catching up with work has been tricky. We've also had the first of the Yateley 10k Road Races, which went successfully and we're already gearing up for the next one. So I've not had a chance to get typing.

My next foot consultant meeting is coming up in a couple of weeks and I eagerly await his update on the old foot situation. Four days stomping round Prague gave me achy feet (really achy feet!) but didn't irritate the old injury - So that's pretty promising!

Anyway I am well and truly back! Updates a plenty and hopefully a bit more foot related excitement in the following weeks!

Finally a chance to sit back with a cup of tea and a good biscuit. Things have been hectic!

Or you could just say that I've been neglecting my blogging duties!

Keep Running and communicating using lots of pointing!

Biscuit Nikki x

The Simple Bare Necessities!

Oh hello there, thanks for dropping by. Gather round and get comfortable because this could be a controversial post...

Are you sitting comfortably? Then I'll begin...

*Disclaimer: The following post is purely my opinion and based on very little/no scientific fact

There is a craze sweeping the running scene at the moment. I have used the term 'craze' but have also heard it described as an 'epidemic', 'revoloution' and 'fad'. All or none may be correct, but I chose craze just because the topic does seem to make people go a little coco-loco at the moment. Do you know what it is yet?

Barefoot running.

It's often heralded by the barefoot running community as the answer to eliminating a lot of injuries and the book 'Born to Run' is credited with helping to give it the hypothetical 'leg up' on it's way to public awareness. Before I get stuck in, let me just explain to all our non-running friends what I am talking about:

Barefoot running is pretty much what it says on the tin - running without shoes. However in the running world it also covers people who run in extremely minimalist shoes, a common brand being the Vibram five fingers (refered to as VFF). VFF's are like gloves for your feet, providing the feeling of runing barefoot without the pain of treading on sharp stones. Try treading on an upturned plug/stickle brick for an idea of why VFF's are a very good idea if you want to grin and bare it.


VFF - taken from good olde Wikipedia

It is claimed (note the claimed) that running barefoot is in fact better for us and there would be far fewer foot/leg injuries in the community if we didn't have such supportive shoes. The logic kind of makes sense. When you have your foot in a plaster cast for several months the muscles weaken and people often require intensive physio to get back to 'normal' again. The same is believed by the barefoot brigade about overly supportive and cushioned shoes, by providing all the extra support the muscles do less work and hence we get more injuries. (Simplistic view). If you are really interested in the philosophy behind it just google barefoot running and you will be bombarded with information.

In fact, it seems to be making a lot of headway. Many shoe companies have now launched more minimalist shoes to cater for the demand. I should know - I've brought a pair of Nike Free +2 and  have to admit they are extremely comfortable - although being injured still I have not run in them.

Then there's the 'anti' barefoot gang. It's difficult to know exactly how to describe the 'anti's' as I have yet to meet someone who genuinely hates/disapproves of barefoot running. I think it's more a case of people either being sceptical or deciding it's great for others but not for them. So we'll call them the sceptics.

From my trawling of various forums it does seem a little like the barefoot brigade think that everyone is out to get them and anyone questioning the barefoot revolution is automatically part of the 'anti' gang, when in fact they are just sceptical.

The reason for all the scepticism? Well there's not actually any solid scientific proof that barefoot running is actually better for us. In comparison to running shoes it hasn't been around nearly long enough to obtain any valid or concrete results. There have been a few minor studies carried out and printed in low impact scientific journals, often quoted on barefoot running websites, but when looked at in detail (rather than just the abstract) they only provide 'snapshots' of running and none have really been big or thorough enough to make any real conclusions. One study I looked at actually discounted two barefoot runners from it's results, as they had to drop out half way through the tests due to injuries - doesn't really seem right does it?

Ok so now I sound like a skeptic. Let me balance the books - whilst there is no scientific research done to prove barefoot running is better/worse for us, there's also no scientific research to prove that running shoes are better/worse for us. The barefoot running community is still a very small percentage of all the runners out there, so it's very difficult to compare injury rates etc. and barefoot running isn't helped by the fact that you can't just go out and run without shoes. After years of shod feet it takes many months to build up to being able to run distances like you can in trainers and many barefoot 'wannabes' fall at the first hurdle by attempting to run 6 miles in just VFFs on their first outing.

In my opinion it's just like the races we run. Some people love short sprints and others excel at ultra distances. What appeals to one person may be considered hell for another. It's exactly the same with barefoot running. I have no doubt that it does help some people, just like i have no doubt that trainers help some people too. I have great admiration for those that make the 'transfer' but I am not convinced that barefoot running is for (or will benefit) everyone. I do believe in giving everything a go before poo-pooing it though (sorry for the term). Before jumping on either bandwagon, think about giving it a try and deciding for yourself. So if you fancy trying out a bit of naked feet I have this advice:

Don't just go for it! Get some advice from some of the very detailed barefoot websites and communities that are brimming with tips and tricks to start making the transition. This will keep you (hopefully) free from injury and make the whole process smoother and more rewarding. Remember: Stay safe kids!

And if you don't fancy trying it out? Well then don't. Simples!

So will I be barefoot running soon? No. But will I be running in trainers soon? No.

So let's call it even and go and have a cup of tea and a biscuit shall we?
Now let's make friends and go and gang up on the 'Zumba' or backwards running society...

Keep debating

Biscuit Nikki x

Want to help out and sponsor me? It's easy!
Just go to: http://uk.virginmoneygiving.com/NicolaStanley

Another official press release from BiscuitNikki Towers

Well with all the non-running related activities recently I've been neglecting the blog a bit.
In terms of a running update we're into week 10 of no running - although it really feels like week 100. I counted today, expecting it to actually be a lot more than that. The 'itching to get out' feeling has been replaced by general frustration with the whole situation. So ok, it's only been 10 weeks, but that feels like so so long (insert more moaney self moping comments).

In good news, lots of my fellow Sandhurst Joggers who marshaled at this years marathon got places for the London Marathon 2012 next year through the marshals ballot. Well Done guys!

So what have I been up to? Well with all the beautiful weather and no running orders there was only one polite option; beer festival!

Reading held it's annual beer and cider festival last weekend, the perfect opportunity to meet up with good friends and sit around in tents trying copious amounts of ciders and perrys (in my case at least). The weather was perfect and the atmosphere was relaxed and extremely chilled out, giving it a good festival vibe that made the whole site feel like a giant pub. It was great to catch up with some old uni friends that I don't see nearly as much as I'd like and be joined by my lil sister too. For the first time in ages I didn't want to be running in the beautiful weather.

In sadder news forest fires have been raging in Swinley Forest/Crowthorne Woods, my favourite place to run and walk. The surrounding roads (including the main road from my house) have been closed for over a week whilst the fire brigade do their best to try and get it under control. At last report over 300 hectares had been affected and two stupid youths have been arrested on suspicion of arson. I'm quite upset by it. I love that area and am very reluctant to go over there now as I imagine it's going to be absolutely devastated. The marsh areas usually recover well from fire but the large trees will be a different matter. There are no decent photos showing the damage yet and I think that might be something to be pleased about. I really don't want to see.

So I'm not going to be the only one trying to recover in the following weeks. Perhaps by the time I am able to run over there some of the wildlife and greenery will have started to grow and return. I'm going to try and concentrate on flexibility and core strength over the coming few weeks, putting me in the best position once I am allowed to pound the pavements again.

If you're a regular reader of my mindless dribble then you might be pleased to know I've added a new tool - you can now subscribe by e-mail, meaning that when I write a new update you wont have to wait for me to post a link on facebook. And at Biscuit-Nikki towers we hold client privacy with the highest importance so wont pass your e-mail onto any third parties or contact you about anything other than blog updates.

Fancy following in my racing footsteps? The Yateley Road Race series is starting next month. It consists of three 10k road races through the summer, on the first Wednesday of June, July and August. All money raised is donated to local charities and the organisation is top notch! (I should know - I am on the committee).
Come on guys, we need to 'right the balance' - if I can't run one of you lot will have to!
For more information follow the link below to the Yateley Road Race website:

Yateley Road Race Home

Keep running!

Biscuit Nikki x

Sticks and stones may break my bones

Actually sticks and stones will break my bones if combined with running too much. It's official, hottest news around (aside from something in the side columns about a "Royal Wedding") I have a confirmed stress fracture on the 2nd metatarsal!

So that pretty much explains all that pain then! And you all thought I was just slacking off (only kidding!).

So what does this mean? Erm, nothing really. It was identified via X-ray, which means it has already started to heal, as this is the only way it will show up. It's actually quite a fair way into the healing process and from my point of view I can't really feel much discomfort or pain there any more.

The doctor is a tad over cautious and has made another check up appointment with me in 2 months time. I was tempted not to mention this so I don't get yelled at when I am out, but he has requested no running until then. 8 weeks! Another 8 weeks and we're already 9 weeks in! Clearly he's slightly insane (well it can't possibly be me).

I'm still in many minds about this. Healing time for a met fracture is supposed to be 6-8 weeks (a lot longer if it's a tibia). As I'm now on week 9 with no pain and only slight discomfort at times, I personally feel 8 weeks is way too long. Everything I have seen suggests that you can start run/walking once you're able to briskly walk for 1 hour without pain. I am up to 2 hours. I am going to gauge it all on feel, but as it's still a bit achy every now and then I don't intend to do anything just yet. Of course I am biased because quite clearly I have a running addiction.

Going to finish with a bit of a quote for the day, the parents of younger children might recognise it from 'The Bee Movie'

" According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly.

It's wings are too small to get it's fat little body off the ground.

The bee of course, flies anyway

because bees don't care what humans think is impossible"



From a 'Daily Mail' article about bees. Oh and it's a picture of a bee.

This makes me think about other anomalies. Scientists say that the best body type for sprinters is a muscular build standing somewhere between 5'11 to 6'3. They say Usain Bolt doesn't have the right build to be a fast 100m runner. Not entirely sure if they've said that to his face of course, it wouldn't give them much of a head start to run away (for you fact lovers: at top speed (inc reaction time) Bolt runs the equivalent of 23mph).

So who wants to help me prove that biscuits are in fact the perfect running fuel...

Keep watching Royal Weddings (and more interestingly hard core Royalist fans that turn up 2 days before the event to start camping on the pavement)

Biscuit Nikki x

Want to sponsor my recovery and (eventual) marathon for Brain Tumour UK?

 It's easy! Just go to: http://uk.virginmoneygiving.com/NicolaStanley  

Tales from the front line

The Virgin London Marathon is a truly spectacular event. With over 37,000 people successfully making it to the start line the statistics only get better from there:

750,000 bottles of water
1,250 portable toilets (and 400 urinals)
6,000 volunteers (Not including start/finish and course marshals which account for another 6,000)
7,200 Blogs!
30ish Sandhurst Joggers!

and many, many cheering crowds.

With my sign safely stashed on the Sandhurst Joggers coach, I accompanied the 50 runners to the start area at some stupid time in the morning, which I wasn't completely sure existed. Lots of nervous chattering on the way into London and a brief state of madness, when my competitive side tried to encourage the bus driver to race the other coaches (it didn't work - he's good at his job) and we were there. The organisation is second to none with clear signs (and giant balloons) guiding the runners to their correct starting zones.

With my huge sign in my hand I started my own journey to my cheering point. Having only decided on the coach that morning that I was heading for mile 17, it turned out I'd made a very good decision. Mile 17 is just in front of the Crossharbour DRL tube station and is equipped with everything a spectator needs including a pub with a live band, a wall to sit on whilst waiting and an ASDA (with toilets!). I recommend it to anyone wanting a good place to watch - I was at the front and had lots of room with no one behind me (making leaving to get the tube again very easy).

It wasn't long before the elites came zooming past. A group of kids next to me didn't really understand the difference between elites and normal runners, so the world champions were cheered along with accompanying kids shouts of 'believe in yourself - you can do it!'. If they'd ever doubted that they would finish, this hopefully gave them an added boost, as well as drawing a smile to those standing nearby.

Then began the slow and steady flow of the mass runners. I take my imaginary hat off to each and every one of you. The sun had come out to contradict the UK's rainy habit and boy was it hot hot hot. Many runners were struggling to cope with dehydration, but the vast majority just kept on going, aided by the frantic cheering crowds eager to help and motivate those to do something that they themselves might never achieve.

It's a really humbling experience watching people loosing their voices and getting blisters on their hands as they cheer for strangers they will probably never meet. An old man stood next to me waiting to see his granddaughter and was doing his best to shout out every name he could read from runners' vest tops!

I found it really difficult to spot the people I knew - often to the stage where they were practically waving in my face before I noticed them. I did my best to cheer everyone and try to provide added support to those that I knew (and could see), but the sheer amount of people becomes hypnotizing after a while. Soon I was ready to do a battle of my own as I attempted to transverse London on the Underground carrying a huge sign.

For once people were helpful (a rarity on London transport on any other day) as they made room for me (although being bashed on the head by a huge cheering sign does tend to make you move) and I enjoyed the banter that usually went along the lines of "running 26.2 miles? Pah they should try spectating!" and various other jokes that we all found very funny at the time but now I think about them they were pretty rubbish.

I found a few Sandhurst Joggers lounging (nice word for collapse) in St. James Park and I set up the 'meeting point' for the return coach journey. My crowd management skills turned out to be pretty poor as I did my best to round everyone up ready for the journey back to the coach. It is probably safe to say that it's a good job I am not organising the marathon, or the start would be delayed by hours whilst I waited for people that had got out of bed late or got stuck in the traffic!

Then to top the day off I sent the majority of the group off to the coach and then followed up with about 6 runners who I then got a little bit lost. Lesson learned: Marathon runners do not enjoy walking more than they have to after a race. My bad - we all know my navigational skills are on par with a goldfish though so I can't really be to blame.

So (mostly) we all got back safely. I had a wonderful day and am so so proud of all our runners who completed the course. I wont list you all because just like coach monitoring I am bound to forget someone, but you're all amazing and I hope your legs have recovered a bit now. I also want to mention all the volunteers we provided for the finish line - good work guys! Having helped marshal before I know it's a long old day but hopefully an extremely rewarding one and I can't wait to (hopefully) see some of you at the finish line next year!

Oh and as a shameful self-plug the sign made it into the Guardian newspaper write up:
LINK

Well I wasn't just going to let that pass was I?

So how can I sum the day up?
Hot
Inspiring
Long (in both distance, time and the queues for the tube)
Emotional
Proud - for both our capital city putting on an amazing effort and for all the runners and volunteers.

So we all know spectating isn't really my thing, although I seem to be getting the hang of it, but there is no where I would have rather been on Sunday.

Here's to joining you all next year!

Keep inspiring!

Biscuit Nikki x